What is your Love Type?
For years we’ve been talking about “Mars” and “Venus” in relationships, how men and women want and need different kinds of communication in relationships.
While I think there are some very small places where men and women are biologically and physiologically different from each other, it seems to me that a lot of these man/woman kinds of communication formulas actually harm or limit both genders.
For example, there are some women who are not emotional and don’t need verbal intimacy and long hours of listening. And there are some men who really crave an intimate emotional conversation and who need to be listened to in a loving and patient way.
It’s too easy to lump men and women into a clean, simple formula.
Frankly, I don’t believe we should be using formulas when we are trying to understand humans at all. When you understand that each one of us is uniquely configured and has our own relationship “DNA” (your Human Design), you see that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to communication, relating, intimacy, love and even sex.
Your Human Design tells you a lot about what works for you in relationships and what you need to feel loved, valued and accepted.
In the Human Design System there are five energy Types. Each Type has a different set of needs and a different way of communicating. The five Types are called the Manifestor, the Generator, the Manifesting Generator, the Projector and the Reflector.
Over the next couple of days I’d like to share with you some information about how to communicate best with each Type. Today I’m going to share with you some information about the Manifestor.
The first Human Design Type is called the Manifestor. Manifestors are powerful energy beings who are here to create. They have an internal, non-verbal creative flow and when they want to do something, the simply get into their creative flow and make it happen.
To many of us, Manifestors can seem like fast-moving, independent people who seem to just leap up and go do something. Our natural impulse when we see a Manifestor on the move is to try to offer them our assistance or ask them what they’re doing. Our questioning often triggers a despairing or sometimes even “snappy” reply and we are hurt or don’t feel needed in response.
Sometimes we feel angry with our Manifestor beloveds because they just do things and forget to tell us what they’re up to and we’re confused about what the “plan” is because we don’t know what’s going on!
The good news is that none of this is personal!!
Your Manifestor beloved isn’t purposely leaving you out, messing with your plans or snapping at you because of anything you’ve done wrong.
It’s hard for a Manifestor to find the words to describe what they are doing. Remember, they have in internal NON-VERBAL creative flow. It’s takes a lot of energy for them to stop and find the words to tell you what they’re doing. When they do stop, they lose they’re creative flow so they feel exasperated or even angry.
A Manifestor who is conscious of their energy will avoid a lot of the tension they can create when they remember to tell people what they’re doing before they do it (as unnatural as that may seem). This helps people be prepared and even stay out their way so that they can do what they came here to do: CREATE!
Another important thing to remember when communicating with a Manifestor is that they can’t answer questions. It’s very difficult for them.
If you love a Manifestor, learn to get information from them by engaging with them with curiosity and using phrases such as:
“I’m wondering how you feel about….”
“I’m curious what you think about…..”
If you love a Manifestor, they need a lot of freedom to do what they feel inspired to do. Don’t be hurt if they seemingly don’t need you. They probably don’t and if they do, they’ll let you know.
The good news is that they LOVE you and WANT you, even if they don’t need you to get things done. There is a big difference between “needing” and “loving”. Even though your Manifestor may seem to be an independent person, that doesn’t mean they don’t love you and are grateful to have you in their life.