I hope this month brings you deep and radical self-love that attracts the people and partners who love you as much as you love yourself.
February is the month when we focus on relationships, romance and Valentine’s Day. This isn’t just because of the placement of a designated day of romance right smack dab in the middle of the month.
The annual planetary transits support the contemplation of love, passion, peace, bonding and intimacy every February.
During this month we’re going to be exploring how to love each other by Type.
Each Type has different relationship needs, different ways of communicating and different ways of feeling loved. You’re going to learn what you need to feel loved and how you can better love your partner.
Before we start this exploration I want to share with you one very important thing. When we fail to love ourselves, we tend to think of ourselves as “victims” – victims of fate, victims of other people, victims of an unfair world….Once you see yourself as a victim, you give up the authority to manage your life. You seek solutions, validation, love and more from OUTSIDE of yourself. There is no perfect partner who can override your victim consciousness.
Quantum physics tells us that the field of quantum information that we create with our thoughts and emotions eventually manifests “in formation” in the material world. If you want to experience sweet, juicy, passionate, undying love, you have to create that field of information first. You have to BE that first.
To be loved you have to first love yourself in order to experience true love in your life.
For years we’ve been talking about “Mars” and “Venus” in relationships, how men and women want and need different kinds of communication in relationships.
While I think there are some very small places where men and women are biologically and physiologically different from each other, it seems to me that a lot of these man/woman kinds of communication formulas actually harm or limit both genders.
For example, there are some women who are not emotional and don’t need verbal intimacy and long hours of listening. And there are some men who really crave an intimate emotional conversation and who need to be listened to in a loving and patient way.
It’s too easy to lump men and women into a clean, simple formula.
Frankly, I don’t believe we should be using formulas when we are trying to understand humans at all.When you understand that each one of us is uniquely configured and has our own relationship “DNA” (your Human Design), you see that there is no one-size-fits-all approach to communication, relating, intimacy, love and even sex.
Your Human Design tells you a lot about what works for you in relationships and what you need to feel loved, valued and accepted.
Over the next couple of weeks I’d like to share with you some information about how to communicate best with each Type. Today I’m going to share with you some information about the Initiator Type (in Quantum Human Design™) Manifestor (in Traditional Human Design.)
Sidebar: Quantum Human Design™ is a new and transformed Human Design language deliberately engineered and upgraded by Karen Curry Parker. This new vocabulary is a positive, powerful and empowering, higher vibrational frequency language, making it more expansive, expressive and comes with a more comprehensive understanding to help you fully activate your potential.
To many of us, Initiators can seem like fast-moving, independent people who seem to just leap up and go do something. Our natural impulse when we see an Initiator on the move is to try to offer them our assistance or ask them what they’re doing. Our questioning often triggers a despairing or sometimes even “snappy” reply and we are hurt or don’t feel needed in response.
Sometimes we feel angry with our Initiator beloveds because they just do things and forget to tell us what they’re up to and we’re confused about what the “plan” is because we don’t know what’s going on!
The good news is that none of this is personal!!
Your Initiator beloved isn’t purposely leaving you out, messing with your plans or snapping at you because of anything you’ve done wrong.
It’s hard for an Initiator to find the words to describe what they are doing. Remember, they have in internal NON-VERBAL creative flow. It’s takes a lot of energy for them to stop and find the words to tell you what they’re doing. When they do stop, they lose their creative flow so they feel exasperated or even angry.
An Initiator who is conscious of their energy will avoid a lot of the tension they can create when they remember to tell people what they’re doing before they do it (as unnatural as that may seem). This helps people be prepared and even stay out their way so that they can do what they came here to do: CREATE!
Another important thing to remember when communicating with an Initiator is that they can’t answer questions. It’s very difficult for them.
If you love an Initiator, learn to get information from them by engaging with them with curiosity and using phrases such as:
“I’m wondering how you feel about….” “I’m curious what you think about…..”
If you love an Initiator, they need a lot of freedom to do what they feel inspired to do. Don’t be hurt if they seemingly don’t need you. They probably don’t and if they do, they’ll let you know.
The good news is that they LOVE you and WANT you, even if they don’t need you to get things done. There is a big difference between “needing” and “loving”. Even though your Initiator may seem to be an independent person, that doesn’t mean they don’t love you and are grateful to have you in their life.
Next week we’ll explore loving the Generator Types (The Alchemist and Time Bender Types in Quantum Human Design™)
Here’s to Love – the power that runs the Cosmos and sets the tone and direction for all of Creation.
From my Heart to Yours,
• • •
To learn how to be in better relationship with the Initiators (Manifestors) in your life, enroll in our Transform Your Relationships by Design program. Learn More HERE.