For Those of us who Used to be Children…

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Here is an email that I received from one of my subscribers. I think this amazing woman poses some very, very important questions that we all need to be thinking about:

“I am the mother of a six year old autistic
child and a third grade teacher. I ask this of you because of a
workshop you offered some time ago and thought you would be able to
offer suggestions. If you would be so kind as to take the time to
question and answer what you believe we should be doing for our
children to prepare them for what they will be responsible for in
twenty years? What are you doing for yours, I know you have a few of
your own what are your thoughts? I would appreciate any time you could
offer to answering this question. It is a concern as I try to meet
their needs in the world of Public Education.”

Over the next few weeks I will be posting some of my responses on my Human Design blog. I hope that you will join me in this conversation and that some of our collective insights might help you help the children in your life.

I will start with some of my personal thoughts and ideas and then follow up with some thoughts related to Human Design, as well as intentional parenting.

(If I sound radical or even slightly frustrated in sharing some of my ideas, please forgive me. This topic is a pretty hot topic for me personally as a mother of five children and a child development specialist. My intention is to offer some solutions and creative ideas but I can’t promise I won’t take off on a tangent periodically….)

My first thought in answering the question what should we be doing for our children to prepare them for what they will be responsible for is this. We have to “clean up” our own issues, conditioning and belief systems that keep us from seeing our children as the perfect creatures they are designed to be.

My dinner table has been a gathering place for many teenagers over the 8 years. I have borne witness to some pretty amazing conversations and brilliance coming out of the mouth of “babes”. If we are to deliver our world into the hands of the young adults, teens and children of today, I think that the world and its inhabitants are going to be in pretty good hands.

I think we are the ones we should be worried about first. I would argue that in order to effectively “raise” the next generation, we need to carefully examine some of our old beliefs that I believe no longer really apply to children of today.

Here are some basic beliefs that I invite us to think about releasing:

1. Children don’t have a natural urge to learn. If we leave them to their own devices, all they’ll do is play and goof off.

2. Children need to suffer to learn.

3. Discipline, rigor and repetition are the only ways a child can master anything.

4. Children misbehave because they want attention.

5. Children misbehave because they are spoiled.

6. Children misbehave because they are stubborn.

7. Children are selfish and self-centered and need to be trained to be compassionate, giving and to care about others.

8. Children can’t control how they behave.

9. Your child’s behavior is a reflection of your adequacy as a parent.

10. There is a formula to raising and education children “correctly”. Follow the formula and “poof”…you get a perfect child.

11. Play is a frivolous part of childhood. So is the freedom to experiment and explore.

12. Spanking and good, hard discipline = love to a child.

13. Total freedom = love to a child.

There are many more beliefs that we need to give some serious thought to. I welcome your thoughts and I propose a new paradigm for supporting children in the natural “unfolding” of who they are.

First and foremost, the most important question anyone who loves a child (or adults, even!) needs to ask is this:

Who are you and how can I best support you on your journey?

The second thing we need to consider is how has our own upbringing and social/collective conditioning contributed to our perception of children? How we are conditioned to “see” our children greatly influences our expectations and how we treat our children.

Let me clarify. Look at the picture below and see the image of two people’s faces looking at each other:

rubin vase1

Do you see them?

Now look at the image again. Do you see the vase?

Usually, when people look at this optical illusion, they will see the image that they expect to see. If I say faces, most people will see faces. If I say vase, most people will see a vase.

What you are conditioned to expect influences your perception.

This isn’t just woo-woo consciousness stuff. It’s actually neurobiology. Our brains contain an information selection system call the Reticular Activating System (RAS). At any given point in time, we have the potential to be overwhelmed by stimulation. The RAS creates an “information filter” in your brain so that you only pay attention to the stimulation that is alignment with your expectation.

How many times have you decided to purchase a new car and suddenly seen that car everywhere you go. Are there really more of those cars on the road or are you noticing them because that particular car is part of your information filter?

In relationships, people will often rise (or fail) to meet our expectation depending on our expectations and beliefs, i.e. our conditioning.

People have basic needs. Human Design shows us that in the highest expression of our True Self we are:

· Perceive ourselves as lovable

· Have high self-worth

· Live and express ourselves authentically

· We are courageous and take leaps of faith

· We know how to make effective decisions and have a sense of personal power

· We are emotionally wise

· We understand our own “knowingness” and trust our own insights

· We know how to leverage our energy so that we are sustainable in life

When children (and adults) are not being supported in expressing these energies appropriately, they will misbehave or in some way challenge the system.

In other words if a child (or adult) is not feeling, lovable, worthy, authentic or like their choices are respected and if they are frightened, emotional and tired, they will misbehave or have other challenges.

Misbehavior is simply a way to communicate that someone is not aligned with their Truth.

When we understand this, it helps us to rewrite some of our old beliefs about children. This awareness helps us understand that misbehavior is simply a child’s way of communicating that they aren’t feeling loved, valued, powerful and accepted for who they are.

When we, as teachers, parents, grandparents and people who used to be children ourselves understand these key needs, we can begin to support children in finding appropriate ways to communicate their needs and support the child in discovering ways to get their basic needs met.

I believe that each human being is a uniquely designed, magnificent being. (Children and adults alike.) The way in which we express and feel our lovability, power and worthiness will be different for each and every one of us.

True love comes when you accept and create space for someone to be exactly as they are created to be. Human Design is a powerful tool to help you truly see your Loved Ones (and yourself) and support them in expressing their Divine Magnificence.

When you understand how your child, parent, friends, lovers, partners are energetically wired, you learn how to honor who they are, treat them with respect and love them without the blinders of conditioned expectations.

Stay tuned. Next week I will write more about supporting children. I want to share with you some thoughts on mutation and evolution and where I think we’re headed with these amazing kids!

Remember to hug each other tight and say, “I love you” at least 10 times a day!




One Reply to “For Those of us who Used to be Children…”

  1. I love the parenting advice. I wish I knew human design when my kids were young. I would have recognized a couple of things. I am a 5/1 reflector and I would have not tried to make immediate decisions, as I found in retrospect many of them were really damaging. They were both generators, one isa 6/2 the other a 4/6, I would have recognized giving. The 6/2 time to work through his late blooming stage , he’s 27 and still confused about a career choice , haha. I now in retrospect understand why I was an emotionally connected (like amazing psychic connection to them both), and physically exhausted most of the time. I bought your book Karen, and although I have read Chetan’s book, in fact he lives in my city! and it know him and Carola well, I like your perspective. My husband is a 6/2 manifestor, and we just separated, as he walked out the door rather unexpectedly 🙁 it was a bit of a shock since he is a student of human design as well, and I’ve always given him PLENTY of space. Thanks for sharing your insights.

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Jamila Jamie

Jamila Jamie joined the team in 2020 and is now the Director of the Quantum Alignment System™, which is the advanced integrated Professional Training created by Karen Curry Parker that blends the Emotional Freedom Techniques (EFT), Quantum Human Design™, subtle body therapies (quantum essential oils & quantum flower essences) and traditional coaching. She is the point of contact from the moment you sign up for QAS Professional Training all the way through Certification. Jamila is the creator of the powerful Flower Essences used in this program.

Jamila is a 2/4 Time Bender (Manifesting Generator), Mother of one son, three precious fur babies 🐶🐾 and in true Time Bender fashion is a multi-passionate entrepreneur.

She is a Quantum Energist, Certified Homeopath, Quantum Alignment System Practitioner & Quantum Human Design Specialist as well as certified in numerous other energy healing and psychology techniques.

From as long as she can remember she was always able to see and know things about people by being able to “read” their energy. An avid learner and self-proclaimed geek, she has been delving in Human Design for over 10 years and uses this as the guidepost in all her work.

Jamila is also the creator of Quantum Essences. A unique and powerful holistic line of what her clients call “magical potions” 🪄 that elevate energy healing and help you realign with your energy template.

Jamila has written for several established websites and magazines. It is her passion to help women liberate their energy and take back their power, so they live authentically…Bold, Fierce, & Free.

Kristin Anne

Kristin Anne joined the team in 2020 and is now the Chief Operating Officer (COO) overseeing and managing the daily operations of the Quantum Alignment System, LLC in its purpose and mission of waking people up to their innate creativity and unlimited possibility through modeling and teaching grace, contribution and alignment with the Cosmic Plan.

Kristin is Made to Love ❤️ it’s what she does, it’s Who she is. She even has it tattooed on her left forearm so it’s the first thing she sees when waking up every day as a reminder of why she’s here. Everything she does, says and shares is from the abundance and overflow of Love that just oozes out of her (and not because her life has been all sunshine and roses, it’s her dark days and life experiences that have refined her into the Light she is today.) It’s why regardless of what her day was like or what’s going on in the world she can lay her head down at night and wake up each morning in deep deep gratitude for being Alive and still having people in her life that she gets to Love and serve.

She now gets the honor and privilege of being the person in people’s lives that she used to wish was in hers. She has over 20 years of business management and administration experience. She’s obsessed with process improvement, organization, streamlining, simplification, details and communication. (Oh and Checklists! ✅ Can’t forget the checklists.)

She’s a 2/4 Time Bender (Manifesting Generator), Gemini Sun & Moon and Leo Rising, Certified Quantum Human Design Specialist, Yoga and Reiki Practitioner. She is also a wife to an amazing and supportive partner, Momma of two precious fur babies 🐶🐾 and Soul Sister to many incredible friends who she considers family, a bunch of who she’s met through the beautiful and amazing community that Karen has built.

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